My kids are always looking at me sideways whenever I spout an "old saying"...they just don't get-it. Yet, as I was flipping blueberry oat pancakes this morning, I prayed to God, "Don't throw me out with the bathwater please." Perhaps you are looking at me sideways now?
The Holy Spirit put a song on my lips this morning as I awoke, "Create in a me a Clean Heart....." The remainder of a prayer that I feebly offered up in the dark of the night, just hours before. I had endured the conviction that I had been harboring anger and resentment for along time and had let it infiltrate my home. A heaviness pressed down on me and I was immobile.
My husband and eldest son set up a backyard adventure yesterday afternoon and entertained all who were willing, a chance to repel down and out of the glorious 75 foot maple tree in our front yard. Ropes and clips and harnesses and helmets donned the willing adventurer. Smiles and excitement abounded. Yet, as I watched I could not even bring myself to utter a supportive or encouraging word. It was as if darkness itself had sealed my lips shut and a veil of doom had encased my being. A mono-toned, "that's cool", with a forced smile, was the only utterance I could muster.
With hopelessness I thought, "How does one climb out of this oppression?"
Conversation. Confession.
"Oh Lord, how did I get here?" "Please forgive me."
Throwing off the blankets, and slipping on my slippers, I sang. I pleaded with God.
Make my heart new; cuz man, mine is pretty old and dirty.
Re-new a right standing before you, oh Lord; I am definitely side-tracked and I need you to turn the tracks.
Don't turn from me and "throw me out with the bathwater" please; Even though I know I am unclean before you, I know that you love me and that I am of value because you created me -- so please separate me from the dirty water and make me clean: expounding on the original old saying, "don't throw the baby out with the bath water!"
Give me back the joy of knowing I am saved; Accepted - forgiven - redeemed - promised - and loved.
Yes, Oh God, "Don't throw me out with the bathwater" please.
He is answering me. My mouth opened and a gentle smile parted my lips and I was able to lovingly greet my children, "Good morning!" as I directed them to the warm blueberry oat pancakes. HOPE came and lifted the oppression. I am sustained for another day. Praising my God for his constant and abundant love.
"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me." Psalm 51:10 - 12
Monday, April 30, 2012
Sunday, April 22, 2012
A Choice has to be Made
Have you ever received news that shocked you into a state of frozen numbness? With just such news, I have been like a little child jumping up and down, screaming "No!" inside my heart. Unable to vocalize my stunned state.
Maybe you know what I speak of?
There is no stopping the wave of emotion; lifelessness seems to pervade like a rush over a cliff....a drop into an abyss of nothingness. Thinking clearly is almost impossible. And yet, a choice has to be made.
Will we choose despair and it's life sucking paralysis or will we choose something better, even in our momentary numbness?
I urge you to choose God; He is the "something better."
In faith we can claim His promises and are assured of his love. In the fourth chapter of 1John, it is said, "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." God loves you. He loves me. In His gift of Jesus, we can be assured of no higher or deeper love to come our way.
Hand in hand with God's promises, standing strong in faith, believing He will help you, because He loves you, is the only way free of despair when life crashes in.
Choose to walk with Him my friend; He is all you need.
Maybe you know what I speak of?
There is no stopping the wave of emotion; lifelessness seems to pervade like a rush over a cliff....a drop into an abyss of nothingness. Thinking clearly is almost impossible. And yet, a choice has to be made.
Will we choose despair and it's life sucking paralysis or will we choose something better, even in our momentary numbness?
I urge you to choose God; He is the "something better."
In faith we can claim His promises and are assured of his love. In the fourth chapter of 1John, it is said, "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." God loves you. He loves me. In His gift of Jesus, we can be assured of no higher or deeper love to come our way.
Hand in hand with God's promises, standing strong in faith, believing He will help you, because He loves you, is the only way free of despair when life crashes in.
Choose to walk with Him my friend; He is all you need.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Wide to Deep
"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fulness of God." Ephesians 3:18 & 19
I looked out over the ocean from the top open deck of a cruise ship this past January in the Gulf of Mexico. The photo above is the vision I beheld as the words "wide and long and high and deep" played over and over in my mind like one of those never ending songs sung in round. I thought, How good God is! Sunbeams were penetrating my pores, tingling and warming my body even as the balmy breeze blew in an attempt to cool the shimmering beads of sweat that were just beginning to form. Friends on either side of me. Reggae music lilting in the background. I had a glimpse of the "wide and long and high and deep!" This was an outpouring of God's love - a pinnacle moment.
One year previous, almost to the very week that I was basking in the Gulf of Mexico, I was instead laying on a stretcher in the operating room having a cancerous tumor removed, in the center of the Hospital District in Boston. Upon awakening, I was in pain; cut open from the belly button down about six inches, I found myself stitched and bandaged with wires and tubes coming from everywhere. I was weak and sick and feeling like death warmed over. Yet, the surgery I had was successful and I was alive. I thought, How good God is! This was an outpouring of God's love too - a pinnacle moment as well.
How could I feel the fulness of God in such extremes? I could feel it and know it because I had been given power to grasp by rooting myself in faith, believing - "To grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ." Friend, no matter if you are at the lowest of your lows or the highest of your highs, Jesus is able to reach you and fill you with the fullness of His love. This type of love surpasses knowledge; it surpasses reasonableness & understanding. Yet, I believe it is this fulness of God's love that causes me to both wonder at and know there is always a song of HOPE to sing. Hope in the moment and Hope for what will come but hasn't yet. God sparkled in my successful surgery and He sparkled in my basking in the sunshine on the top open deck of a cruise ship. Each moment was a gift. There is no place that He cannot reach in your life and in your heart. Be "rooted and established", friend. Read God's Word and claim it. Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ as your Savior, and be "filled to the measure of all the fulness of God."
I looked out over the ocean from the top open deck of a cruise ship this past January in the Gulf of Mexico. The photo above is the vision I beheld as the words "wide and long and high and deep" played over and over in my mind like one of those never ending songs sung in round. I thought, How good God is! Sunbeams were penetrating my pores, tingling and warming my body even as the balmy breeze blew in an attempt to cool the shimmering beads of sweat that were just beginning to form. Friends on either side of me. Reggae music lilting in the background. I had a glimpse of the "wide and long and high and deep!" This was an outpouring of God's love - a pinnacle moment.
One year previous, almost to the very week that I was basking in the Gulf of Mexico, I was instead laying on a stretcher in the operating room having a cancerous tumor removed, in the center of the Hospital District in Boston. Upon awakening, I was in pain; cut open from the belly button down about six inches, I found myself stitched and bandaged with wires and tubes coming from everywhere. I was weak and sick and feeling like death warmed over. Yet, the surgery I had was successful and I was alive. I thought, How good God is! This was an outpouring of God's love too - a pinnacle moment as well.
How could I feel the fulness of God in such extremes? I could feel it and know it because I had been given power to grasp by rooting myself in faith, believing - "To grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ." Friend, no matter if you are at the lowest of your lows or the highest of your highs, Jesus is able to reach you and fill you with the fullness of His love. This type of love surpasses knowledge; it surpasses reasonableness & understanding. Yet, I believe it is this fulness of God's love that causes me to both wonder at and know there is always a song of HOPE to sing. Hope in the moment and Hope for what will come but hasn't yet. God sparkled in my successful surgery and He sparkled in my basking in the sunshine on the top open deck of a cruise ship. Each moment was a gift. There is no place that He cannot reach in your life and in your heart. Be "rooted and established", friend. Read God's Word and claim it. Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ as your Savior, and be "filled to the measure of all the fulness of God."
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